Over the past few weeks I have been working on a few things; most importantly, self love and self respect. After completing woman’s group I realized that the basis of my daily struggles is actually really very simple. For most of my life I have looked to other people for acceptance because, wait for it, I haven’t fully accepted myself for who I am. Initially, upon this realization, I was like, “ouch!” But after I sat with it for a while it started to make so much sense. ‘Like attracts like’ and when you love and respect yourself, you attract people who love and respect you in the same way. The opposite is also true.
Now that I have been surgically put back together and am at the end of my road to recovery, I have begun this new journey or process of being 100% honest with myself. Does this happen all day every day? Gosh no. But when it doesn’t happen and I am having negative thoughts about myself, someone else or a situation that I find myself in, I am now changing my thoughts and words.
We don’t have to do anything. We have choices. With each choice there is a consequence, some positive and some negative. When I find myself thinking negatively, I change my thoughts. If I know that doing something is going to have a negative outcome then I choose not to do it. By honoring myself I have found more happiness. My biggest accomplishment has been saying no a lot more often. Rather than agree to go out on a night that I am exhausted from work I say ‘no thank you,’ go to bed early and wake up the next morning feeling like a million bucks.
Telling myself that I should do something is just setting me up for disappointment. My new favorite saying? “Stop should-ing all over yourself.” Seriously. If you say that you really should go to work it has a negative air to it, like you don’t want to be there. If you say that you’re going to work – I am going to work – there is so much power behind it. With that power comes a little bit of satisfaction 🙂
All if this is never going to happen overnight. It is a process and I am finally learning how to have fun with it. Lucky for me, I have an incredible teacher who has opened up an amazing window in my life.
Respect. Love. Forgive.