Ever experience a time in your life when you get down on yourself for not doing something or letting your ‘To Do’ list get out of control? Be honest, we all have at one time or another. We make these lists, goals and time frames but when motivation fades, so do the outcomes of our said commitments.
People who don’t find themselves in such a predicament are able to translate their intentions into actions by consistently holding themselves personally responsible for achieving their goals and they don’t allow excuses to hold them back. Let me introduce you to Accountability. Who knew that such willingness to accept responsibility or account for your actions could have such an effect on your life?!
Well, when you don’t have a sense of ownership for your goals and commitments then you won’t feel personally responsible for the results. Over time we get increasingly better at crafting and believing our many excuses, justifications and reasons for why we don’t have what we want or why we didn’t fulfill our commitments.
What happens when we DO hold ourselves accountable and we reach our end result? For a long time, I told myself that, “Everything would be fine once the surgeries were over.” Surgeries ended and I told myself, “I will be happier once I live on my own.”Now I live on my own and I am left wondering, when am I just going to be ‘happy’? It’s almost a feeling of, “Now what?”
But you don’t ‘have to’ physically do something to be happy. I placed a “have to” on my happiness and placed my happiness on hold. Happiness is a choice that is not contingent on people or events. It’s accepting and acknowledging the situation and facts and then deciding what the right thing for you is. It is a constant journey without a stopping point.
We’ve all done it: putting our happiness on hold until some magical future date when the big thing that we want happens and we’ll give ourselves permission to be happy. Here’s the problem with that kind of thinking. The big thing may happen, and your life may get lots better when it does. But do you really want to put your happiness on hold until then? Or once the magical date/event has come and gone and the excitement fades, we find ourselves settling in our neutral zone. We aren’t extremely happy and we aren’t sad or angry, but just ‘being’ feels uncomfortable so we create another contingency.
All the while, wasting all of this time and energy when we could be happy no matter what. We all deserve to be happy, we just need to give ourselves permission to be happy right now. So stop putting your happiness on hold, drop the ‘whens, ifs and buts’ and be happy today, right now. Isn’t that the least you can do for yourself, hold yourself accountable for your happiness every day?